I don't know how to describe how I'm feeling other than 'not quite right'. I'm healthy enough so that's a good thing but there is so much going on in my head, so many things I want to achieve and I simply don't know where to start.
I thought that doing a monthly market would make me happy. Turns out I spend way too much stressing over making products and it's beginning to affect my family. I know I'm trying to contribute to our income but when it comes down to it, I'm spending heaps on supplies (I've given up adding the dockets), using any spare time to create products, and I can't even put a decent price on them for fear of not selling enough.
I am considering leaving my 2 part time jobs at the end of the year. My job as a quilt teacher is barely existent. I usually have to cancel the class especially when only 2 students are coming. I would rather spend my time at home with my family than go to work for 3 hours and earn next to nothing for my effort.
My other job as a playgroup leader is good consistant work but I know I could use that time at home cooking, cleaning or gardening and therefore saving money.
I really feel that my job is as a homemaker, it's where I want to be. I am very lucky to have such a supportive husband who insists that I do whatever makes me happy. We don't have a lot of money, we stick to a very tight budget that has now become tighter due to Dan going to England in 2013 to play school cricket. What I do know is that even on one wage we will get him there through how we live our lives, how I budget and becoming a better, more efficient home-maker.
Sorry for the rambling, it seems I have some decisions to make.